Femdom rules: examples to adapt, and how to make them last

Three words get used loosely in femdom. A task is an assignment with an end: do this by Friday and report. A rule has no end date; it governs every day until She changes it. Protocol is the set of manners those rules create, the way he greets Her, writes to Her and asks Her for things. The femdom tasks guide covers assignments; this page is about the rules beneath them.

Rules matter because they reach the hours when nobody is watching. A session lasts an hour, but a rule is there at breakfast, on the train and at bedtime, and keeping it when breaking it would be easy is the quiet heart of service.

The first rules most Mistresses set govern how he addresses Her, because they are simple to keep and hard to forget:

• Address Her by the title She chooses in every message, and never by a first name unless invited.
• Open each message with the greeting She taught you and close with the sign-off She prefers.
• Refer to yourself with a lower-case i when writing to Her, if She likes that convention.
• Send no more than one message a day outside reports, unless She asks for more.
• Thank Her in writing after every private session, in a single line.

Posture rules make the body remember its place. In a one-way private She names them while he holds them unseen, on his honour, and at home they become small private rituals. The slave positions guide describes the named postures and sensible hold times.

• Kneel for the opening minutes of every private, on a cushion or a folded blanket.
• Sit on the floor rather than a chair while watching Her public room, when the floor is comfortable.
• Hold any position She names without fidgeting, but never longer than your knees and back allow.

Rituals are rules tied to the clock. They turn an ordinary day into a string of small acknowledgements of Her:

• Send a morning greeting by the hour She sets, measured by whichever clock the two of you agreed.
• Make the bed and lay out tomorrow's clothes to Her standard before sleeping.
• Write one line in a journal each night about how you served Her that day.
• Drink a full glass of water before the first coffee, because She wants Her servant looked after.
• Spend five quiet minutes preparing before a session: phone silenced, headphones on, door closed.

These are the rules many submissives want most and should agree most carefully. They apply only where both people have agreed them, with a safeword and an emergency rule in place, and the chastity keyholder page covers longer lock-ups:

• No orgasm without permission, requested in writing; no answer means no.
• Touching is allowed only on the days She names, and only as far as She says.
• Wear the chastity device for the periods She sets, with hygiene unlocks on schedule and release at once for any pain or numbness.
• Log each day of denial and state the count at the top of the weekly report.

Reports are how She follows rules She cannot see being kept. Visitors cannot send photos or other media to a DominatrixCam Mistress, so reports are written, and detail is what makes them credible:

• Send a written report at the same hour each week, with failures listed first.
• Confess a broken rule within a day, without waiting to be asked.
• Never invent a success: a confessed failure gets corrected, while an invented success ends trust.
• Keep every report within the length She sets, such as two hundred words.

Money rules need the most care of all, because a rule that damages a budget damages a life:

• Ask before any personal purchase above an amount agreed together.
• Send tributes on a fixed day, at a fixed amount, from a budget written down in advance.
• List the week's discretionary spending in the weekly report.
• Never touch money set aside for rent, bills, debts or savings for any rule, task or tribute.

Before a rule is adopted, put it through three tests. Safe: it cannot hurt his body, so nothing that cuts sleep, skips meals, limits water or holds joints under strain. Private: nobody who has not agreed can notice it or be drawn into it, which rules out anything a colleague, a housemate or a stranger would see. Sustainable: it can be kept on his worst day, ill, travelling or exhausted, and it carries an exception for exactly those days.

Fewer is better. Ten rules are plenty for anyone with a job, and each should be precise enough that he knows at once whether he kept it: 'be respectful' is a wish, whereas 'use Her title in every message' is a rule.

A rule with no consequence is a suggestion, but the consequence must be agreed in advance, proportionate and harmless. Good corrections work on pride and time: lines written by hand, an earlier bedtime, a privilege such as a game or a favourite series withdrawn for a weekend, an extra chore in his own home, or a written apology sent before the next session. The strict Mistress page describes more.

Some corrections are never acceptable: anything that injures, cuts sleep or food, costs money he cannot spare, exposes him to anyone, or grows without limit. A correction ends once it is served, and the slate is clean afterwards.

With one of DominatrixCam's own Mistresses, rules are often set aloud in a one-way private: She speaks, he listens with his camera and microphone off, and there is no chat box to reply in. He writes them down, then sends Her his copy as a message, so any misunderstanding surfaces before the week begins. She cannot watch him keep a single one of them, which is precisely the point: they are kept on trust.

Review the list on a date you both agree, monthly at first. Retire rules that have stopped meaning anything, rewrite the ones that keep breaking, and add new ones only when the old ones run without effort. The female-led relationship guide has a printable rules tool for keeping the current list on paper, and slave training shows how rules fit into a longer programme.